I don’t know if you’ve been there. I certainly have. It’s when you feel like you can’t do anything right. It’s when even simple things seem hard. It’s when life seems to be going so bad that you can’t believe it. This is around the time that you start losing confidence in yourself. This is around the time people lose faith in themselves and their abilities. And they start using the word “failure” to describe themselves. I can honestly say that those times in my life when I’ve felt like that have been truly awful. When you are feeling low and miserable, it can be hard to try and maintain or build your confidence. After all, you feel like you have plenty of evidence that you are no good since you can’t seem to do anything right. The key here is to change your focus. When we feel down, we start focusing on what’s bad. My memory when I have been down has seemed to be very selective. Only remembering the bad things that have happened in my past. And only remembering the bad things in my life at the moment. Any good stuff is discounted. Any achievements are forgotten. It’s poison for our self-confidence. So the first thing is to change your focus. To do this, an easy thing to do is to write down any successes you have had in life. And I mean anything! When you feel really down, it may be hard to think of any achievements but if you think hard you will have to acknowledge things that you have done in the past that have been successes. Remember, even the smallest of successes counts. Once you start writing, you’ll find it easier and easier to come up with successes. The aim is to write down at least 30-50, preferably more. The trick here is to not start saying “Oh, but that’s not a real success”. Just stay focussed on anything that made a difference in your life or someone else’s. As you get better at this, you’ll be able to find success in almost everything you do. Try and do this every day if you can. The act of focussing on successes will give you a quick boost when you’re feeling down, and lay the ground for more and more success.

I don’t know if you’ve been there. I certainly have. It’s when you feel like you can’t do anything right. It’s when even simple things seem hard. It’s when life seems to be going so bad that you can’t believe it. This is around the time that you start losing confidence in yourself. This is around the time people lose faith in themselves and their abilities. And they start using the word “failure” to describe themselves. I can honestly say that those times in my life when I’ve felt like that have been truly awful.

When you are feeling low and miserable, it can be hard to try and maintain or build your confidence. After all, you feel like you have plenty of evidence that you are no good since you can’t seem to do anything right.

The key here is to change your focus.

When we feel down, we start focusing on what’s bad. My memory when I have been down has seemed to be very selective. Only remembering the bad things that have happened in my past. And only remembering the bad things in my life at the moment. Any good stuff is discounted. Any achievements are forgotten. It’s poison for our self-confidence.

So the first thing is to change your focus. To do this, an easy thing to do is to write down any successes you have had in life. And I mean anything! When you feel really down, it may be hard to think of any achievements but if you think hard you will have to acknowledge things that you have done in the past that have been successes. Remember, even the smallest of successes counts.

Once you start writing, you’ll find it easier and easier to come up with successes. The aim is to write down at least 30-50, preferably more.

The trick here is to not start saying “Oh, but that’s not a real success”. Just stay focussed on anything that made a difference in your life or someone else’s. As you get better at this, you’ll be able to find success in almost everything you do.

Try and do this every day if you can. The act of focussing on successes will give you a quick boost when you’re feeling down, and lay the ground for more and more success.



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A guide to  change and success

The significance of change in its effects on mankind is not to be underestimated. It has been our ability to change and adapt that has made us the most successful animals on the planet. If we were not capable of change there would be no houses, cars, aeroplanes or computers . In times of need Human beings have effected change in their behaviour  in order to save lives.

The power of change extends to the external world around us not just to ourselves. We continue to shape our environment  in order to make life more  safe or comfortable just as our ancestors did. The radical changes of the 20th century have changed our lives so profoundly that it is hard to imagine any other way of living. It is the rapid pace of change that creates new challenges to overcome. It is also true to say that the rapid pace  of change also creates new opportunities for us to embrace as well.

The successful person is always willing to adapt and change with the world around them. The really successful person is one who is able to create change in the  world around them.  An aware and inquisitive mind is a must have. Therefore, the successful person must be sensitive to the goings on in the world around them.  A top businessman, for example,  needs to be conscious of gaps in the market that they are ready to exploit.

A positive frame of mind will  form the base of  a can do attitude. People who think positively are far more likely to  see challenges rather than problems or opportunities rather than difficulties.. The positive mental attitude of the successful businessmen means that opportunity becomes a reality ; because they also have the drive and motivation to succeed and make their dream come true . So as you can see there is much to be gained from developing a state of optimism in your character about change.  The problem for a lot of people is in developing it and overcoming bad habits.

One of the reasons top businessman are able to adapt and change so readily is because they remain optimistic in their appraisal of change. Rather than running terrified of the unknown successful business people are eternal optimists.   A change equals a fresh opportunity, it is no surprise that the most dynamic and successful people are those who change and adapt accordingly to the environment and the situation. It fits in with what Darwin called ‘survival of the  fittest’ . The most successful species are those that have adapted to their environment and made adaption’s to change when necessary. Therefore take confident that change is part and   parcel of living. Without it we would become stagnant and boring.

§ Therefore  develop optimism– optimists are self-disciplined and persistent in what they want to achieve in their life. Optimists plan and take action to move forward. They constantly learn about how to get better at their skills. Their self-confidence helps them to look for solutions and lead them to success in their goals. If you are pessimistic it is time you shed your pessimistic attitude and develop optimism in its place. There is no place in the world of success for negative attitudes. Think about what you can do rather than what you cannot.

It is  certainly true to say  about humanity that we tend to regard what we are not good at as more significant than what we are. Appraisals at work tend to provide feedback on areas that require improvement whereas school reports may be full of praise but are always encouraging growth and development in other areas. Focusing on deficiencies is certainly important for self improvement. But being overly critical and analytical is not. The trick is to find the balance, it is important to remind yourself what you are good at if you are to have the confidence to tackle other things.

   

Having the courage to learn and change may not necessarily make you a happy person, but it will help you negotiate hard times more smoothly and successfully as well as learn from these experiences.  Knowing how your brain works helps you know when and how to intervene in managing your mind to make the process of adaptation happen more smoothly and perhaps more quickly.  It also helps you monitor both the conscious and unconscious spheres of your mind and gives you feedback about whether you are adapting successfully.

This is just the begining, for more info on gaining confidence and destrying negative thoughts go to www.sureconfidence.com and watch the FREE video.  Good Luck



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The best part is that you don’t have to be miserable, unhappy, or stuck anymore if you listen to what I did and follow these same steps.

How many times do you find yourself in situations – a job, or social group, or a way of life that you have NO business being in or around?

This is NOT you!

Your voice silenced?

Your essence shunned?

And your power, dormant?

OR perhaps, you’re going to the next level, undertaking your biggest risk ever, but pressured by the people around you to “maintain status quo”? And you know that you’re NOT growing or challenging yourself?

OR you sway back-and-forth, conflicted on what to do, and you become a billboard of a mixed message? You know people don’t know who you are, or what you’re standing for?

For instance, I was working—just getting through the day and disconnected from myself in a big way! I was playing small, seeking approval and people pleasing, and the more I did it, the worse I felt; and before I knew it, my life was like a ship lost at sea. I felt trapped in a storm that never ended. I could not see the shores and no help was in sight. I knew that if I did not jump ship, I would drown, and so I did — I jumped!

I swarm, tread water, and kept myself afloat—not seeing any help in sight, for what actually turned out to be years. Something inside myself, however, would not let me die. Would not let me quit. It was clear something it wanted to live, it loved to be alive! Everything shifted. I saw my future—a vision of my destiny and dream life.

THIS IS PERHAPS THE MOST VALUABLE LESSON YOU’LL EVER LEARN!

To get rid of these problems and gain confidence and control over your life, YOU absolutely must listen to your own internal communication system –your inner voice and gut feeling.

Think about it…!

You have a uniquely designed, messaging system personalized just for YOU!

It’s uniquely guiding YOU/advising you where to go, what to do, when, how, and more! It’s the highest barometer YOU CAN TRUST in decision-making and taking action.

So, what exactly is your “inner voice” and “gut feeling”, and why they’re important?

First, the INNER VOICE you hear comes from your Higher Self! Yes, your Higher Self already exists inside of you. Your Higher Self is your dream life that you’ve always wanted existing today. It is always revealing itself by talking to you, speaking your truth, from you heart to guide you to living your dream life everyday.

Your inner voice always connects you to a higher mindset, a way of thinking on the high road, and higher possibilities revealed through your dreams and desires.

Practice listening to your inner voice, follow what it says, and then watch how your confidence boosts.

Second, the GUT FEELING is from the body of your Higher Self existing within you! It reveals your higher way of living existing today by the intensity of its response to situations, opportunities, or people.

A gut feeling that’s warm or positive is your Higher Self revealing happiness, joy, and excitement. It feels as if these experiences are best-suited situations, opportunities and people likely to promote your higher way of living, and likely lead you to the dream experiences you desire.

In direct contrast, a negative gut feeling is uncomfortable and usually a warning to “run” or “avoid”.  These situations, opportunities, or people are often contradictory to your higher way of life, usually NOT in your best interest, and likely leads to unhappiness.

Practice listening to your gut feeling, follow what it says, and then watch how you confidently control your own life.

A FINAL WORD

YOU SHOULD EXPECT other messages to be contrary to the truth about who you are, what you have, and what you can do.

Other messages are designed to say other things.

If you’re having problems in confidence and control over your life, see how to create changes in as fast as 90 days! Simply visit www.TheFeminineFire.com to see how.



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u really learn to gain your confidence naturally? The answer to this question is a resounding yes. However, the actually probability of success will often be based on whether or not you are willing to put the time in that is necessary to achieve such results. You cannot boost self-confidence without a clear and deliberate approach that is undertaken over time. In other words, you need to put the proper effort into your endeavour. When you are willing to take these steps, you can do what is necessary then you will experience a stunning increase in your outlook to your life and how people treat you.

There are a number of steps you can follow in terms of your ability to gain confidence naturally. Many of these steps involve how you actually look at yourself. Often, issues related to one’s confidence are based not so much on other people’s perception of you as much as your perception of yourself. (Understanding is this is a major key component to the ability to gain your confidence naturally) If a negative internal perception ends up projecting to others, they will feed it back to you. So, their poor opinion of you is your own poor opinion of yourself. Consider this the proverbial double-edged sword that undermines you self-esteem.

Since no one would want to deal with such a painfully negative situation, it would be a much better plan to change your outlook on yourself so as to improve how others perceive you. Is this tough to do? Well, it can be but with the proper commitment and effort you can do what is needed to alter the problems you face. In some instances, the ability to change your own outlook and gain your confidence naturally is not as tough as perceived.

One way you can improve your own self-image and self-confidence naturally entails investing a lot of time in activities that you excel with. For example, if you have a particular hobby you are quite good with, spend more time with the hobby. When you do this, you will remind yourself about your own abilities to succeed at various ventures. This, in turn, will lead to gaining an improved opinion of your own self-confidence. When you feel you can succeed at one thing, you can transfer such feelings toward other things as well. This is a great way to gain your confidence in a natural manner.

Can this be achieved overnight? No, such an assessment really would not be possible. As with any other type of skill development, there is a need to take a little time out to put forth the effort to improve one’s chances for success. That means you need to slowly invest time in those activities that boost your self-confidence and do as much as possible to keep your outlook positive. Such an internalised attitude will often lend itself to altering the ways others perceive you which will further improve your self-confidence. Once again, this does not happen quickly but with proper and consistent effort it most definitely can and will happen!

Some people go through life with low self-esteem and they suffer greatly because of it. Why join their ranks when it is possible to gain your confidence naturally? The processes for building self-esteem are available. You simply need to take the small steps to take part in them.

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There are two questions that we are frequently asked regarding the Law of Attraction. The primary questions are usually about money and how to obtain it, but the other question that is frequently asked is: “How do I find the confidence in myself to feel that I can apply the Law of Attraction adequately to attain all my desires?” This is a valid question and is one worth further consideration.

It is a good idea to start with how you feel about yourself. If you are concerned about others’ opinions and how people feel about you, you’ll want to change your perceptions of yourself. When you worry about what others will think of you, this only attracts to you more people and situations that bring you more concerns about yourself. How do you stop the cycle? How do you gain the confidence to make your own decisions without another’s opinions? How do you ‘not care’ when you actually do care what people think of you?

Lee and I have a mantra we go by: Don’t be who you think you are, be who you wish to be.

Now let’s examine this thought a step further: Don’t be who you think others think you are; be who you want to be, not what others tell you that you are.

It sounds easy and, believe it or not, it is. Think about it. Is it important to care what others think of you? If it is important, then why? Is it going to be the end of the world if someone doesn’t like you? Is it the ‘end all be all’ if someone looks at you the wrong way? It feels like it is the end if you let it affect you.

Think about the freedom in not worrying about what others think of you. How can you gain some of that freedom? By letting others have their perceptions of you and not buying into what they seemingly see. Who knows you better? Have these other people ever walked in your shoes? So why do they have some strange power over you to make you feel that you need to care what they think? You have the freedom to create who you want to be. No one can change that.

So who do you want to be? If you could create all the qualities for yourself, what would they be? Would you be happy as that person you just created? And assuming you become this person you created, does it still matter that you’ll likely have the same amount of detractors offering up more negative opinions?

Be who you wish to be; be that girl/guy who is the one that you would admire and who is happy with life. Start being that person now. You can take on the traits you desire now. See yourself as that adventuresome hang glider surrounded by friends who truly see and appreciate you for who you are; a wonderful human being.

Take a look in the mirror. Look yourself right in the eyes and tell yourself, without looking away, what you like about that person in the mirror. If there are qualities that you wish to possess, tell yourself how great it is to have those qualities. You may feel like you are ‘faking’ it at first but your subconscious doesn’t know the difference between real and fake so keep telling it until you feel the shift. You will become the person that you are wishing to be. Your former self will merge with this new confident person. Hold your shoulders back and walk with confidence. Even if you don’t feel confident, by taking the confident walk, you body receives those signals. Others will see confidence and in turn you will feel confident.

When you have this newfound confidence and understand that your world is the only world you should create and that everyone else is creating their world, you can choose to be an actor in their play (their world) or just choose to be an extra in their play with a small part and be a lead role in your play. The more attention you put toward another’s perceptions, the more they become a part of your world and their part in your play gets bigger according to the attention that you give it.

You are the one in control of it. You decide who you want to be in your play. Give them a small part or a larger part. It is entirely up to you who you give more attention to.

Once you have gained the confidence in yourself and know exactly what you want to be and have no doubts, the Universe will bring more confident situations and people to you that will compliment your own wonderful confident vibrations.

Beth and Lee McCain are full time instructors and lecturers in applying the Law of Attraction, or better known as the Secret, in your life to attain whatever you desire. They have a great radio show on Youtube that is both entertaining as well as informative on the subject of the Law of Attraction. Beth and Lee are real people with real answers. For more information, please visit: Beth and Lee McCain Law of Attraction Web Site



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Have you ever approached a woman at a party but have been turned away? Are you often unsuccessful in your attempts at getting yourself a date with the girl you have secretly admired? Have you faced humiliation for your endeavours? If yes, help’s at hand.

Most of us are not born flirts. And let’s accept it does take a while before one can learn the tips and tricks of getting ‘acquainted’ with women. Until then, one has to learn to take the humiliation in good spirit, without feeling too self-conscious. But one important thing that you need to remember is that even if it’s the first time you’re approaching a woman, there are certain dos and don’ts that you need to follow if you don’t want to completely put the girl off.

One of the most important things is your looks. No, this does not mean that you have to be a Greek God – just looking presentable is enough. Model Joanne Robinson feels that since the first impression is usually the last impression, it’s important to be dressed appropriately.

“You don’t have to be dressed in brands, just a simple shirt and jeans would do,” she says. One thing that completely turns her off is tight-fitting t-shirts, especially when worn by men who don’t have a great body. “Why can’t men simply wear a shirt!” she exclaims.

It’s great if you’ve got the looks. But if you don’t have the right attitude, things might not work for you, warns actress Melissa. “The body language plays an important role. One has to be confident when approaching a woman,” she explains. But over-confidence can backfire, warns actor Robert Clark. “Too much attitude can be a put-off. Just be yourself and be confident of who you are. Don’t pretend to be a Robert De Niro. Good humour, of course, helps, but please don’t bore a woman with PJs.

Since we’re on the topic of body language, V J Don Ford advises that men should keep a check on where they’re looking. “Look her in the eye… however distracting it is elsewhere. And avoid too much alcohol, for it can make you do things that you might regret later,” warns Ford.

Many men equate humour with one-liners, which is definitely not the case. Robinson finds one-liners a total put-off. “The most common one-liner that I’ve been subjected to is ‘I think we’ve met before… or was it your sister?’ They expect me to react positively when they claim that they know my twin sister Kim, which is ridiculous,” she says, exasperated.

Bragging is regarded as one of the most unpopular traits among women as well as men. While it is wise to keep the conversation going, vanity is the last thing that would interest a woman. Instead of talking about themselves, their money, their cars and so on, they should make an attempt to know more about the woman. And more importantly, compliment them where required. However, being sugary and syrupy or making cheesy remarks doesn’t work. It sounds so unoriginal.

Actress Mona Wasu is wary of men who use polite gestures for subtle signals. “I was in school and was on talking terms with a guy who was with me in my tuition class. One day he asked me if I had a reference book that he could borrow. I didn’t have the book but told him that I could borrow it from a friend for him. When we were on our way back from my friend’s home, he presented me with a flower and proposed to me.

I was shocked but I expressed my feelings, to which he said that the fact that I was making such an effort was a sign that I’m interested!” explains Wasu.

It’s true – men don’t take rejection too well; and worse, become a pile-on. I recall an incident: “One of my friends used to approach women by asking them for a dance. And if they declined him he would simply say; ‘Oh, I don’t feel like dancing either!’ and would refuse to budge, trying to make small talk with them. I’m sure that can get very irritating.”

Rejection is part of life but why be a spoil sport? Let’s face it, these embarrassing moments give us a reason to laugh years later when we think about them. So go on, don’t give up.



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To lose weight is simple. Yes, you heard it right, it is simple. All it requires is your commitment and dedicated discipline.

NUTRITION – Physiologically, you have to burn 7000 calories to lose 1 kg or 2.2 pounds. You can lose those weight through a combination of decreasing caloric intake to a healthy level and expending calories through physical activities such as taking up an exercise program.

For example, let’s say you are consuming 2,000 calories a day, when you decrease caloric consumption by 300 calories (a small cheese burger) and burn another 200 calories through exercise a day (25 minute jog), you would be at a 500 caloric deficit.

So, just by eating 300 less calories a day and expending 200 calories a day through physical activities will result in a net of half kg lost per week. You are then losing a slightly more than a pound of fat per week. This can be done too by eating food that you enjoy! Simple as promised isn’t it?

Do eat six small meals a day. This will keep your metabolism engine humming throughout the entire day and at the same time, your body will not starve thus will not conserve too much fat. At the same time, as your body is being fed continuously the nutrients that you eat are being utilized more effectively.

WEIGHT TRAINING – Never embark weight loss without weight training because when you are on a diet or cardio (aerobics) only program, you will lose some muscle mass as well. When that happens, your metabolic rate will slow down and fat will be conserved.

You want to lose weight from body fat and not lose weight from muscles. Furthermore, your goal of being sexily attractive and desirable is also defeated because without muscle tone when weight is lost, you will only end up a smaller version of what you were before without any nice sexy curves and muscle tone.

With nice defined toned muscles and less body fat, you will gain self confidence and self esteem real fast.

As a beginner, workout three days per week on alternate days for about 45-60 minutes with weights. Perform exercises for the entire body — doing about 2-3 sets per body part for 8-12 repetitions.

Why do you want to build muscle besides just looking gorgeous? Well, another reason is that for every pound of muscle gained, your body burn an additional of 20-40 calories per day! You burn fat even when you are sleeping! Interesting isn’t it?

Your body will feel firmer, stronger and you will see muscles building up within weeks. Weights are needed to sculpt the type of body that you desire. Just 45 minutes to an hour in the gym will do. Your body needs to recover and if you lift weight intensively, you will produce a hormone called cortisol which can destroy muscle cells after an hour or so of intensive lifting. So more is not better.

Below is a list of recommended exercises you can choose from for each body part:

Leg muscle workout — squats, lunges, leg extensions, leg curl, calf raise, stiff legged dead lifts

Chest/Pecs/Pectoral muscle workout — bench press, incline press, dumbbell fly, push-ups

Back muscle workout — dead-lifts, chin ups, pull-ups, seated row, barbell rows, pullovers

Shoulders/Deltoids/Delts muscle workout — military press, lateral raise, front raise, shrugs

Biceps muscle workout — hammer curl, dumbbell curl, barbell curl, concentration curl

Triceps muscle workout — triceps kickbacks, diamond pushups, press-downs, dips, tricep extensions

Abs/Abdominal muscle workout — bicycle crunch, basic crunch, reverse crunch, knee-ups, the plank, hanging leg raise

AEROBIC EXERCISE – Commonly called cardio workout. Perform cardio 3-4 days per week for 20 minutes. Try to stay in a range of 65- 80percent of your Maximum Heart Rate. Your maximum heart rate is 220 minus your age. In addition, change your mode of cardio every few weeks. The body is designed to adapt, so you need to change your workouts frequently.

Aerobic exercise will help rev up your metabolism (power walking, jogging, swimming and mountain biking). It works like magic when combined with weight training. Try different forms of cardio like participating in active sports. Find an activity that you enjoy!

LIFESTYLE CHANGES – When your lifestyle changes slightly, your weight loss goals will fall into place. You have to start thinking in terms of improving your health, fitness, nutrition and exercise habits.

Forget about fad diets or popping diet pills or slimming pills which usually cause drastic reduction of caloric intake. These diets are difficult to stick to and because of the massive caloric deficit, your body will go into the famine mode and conserve fats for emergency use. Your body will also cannibalize your muscles for energy and that means a slowing down of your fat burning metabolism.

You will sooner or later hit a plateau and when you are off the diet or stop taking diet and slimming pills , all your extra pounds and kilos will come right back.

Your general fitness and health will also improve day by day. It doesn’t matter whether your goal is to lose 10kg or 30kg. Once you have this “lifestyle change” habits, it will get a lot easier.

GOALS – To make your goals work, write them down! Make them measurable and realistic. For example, a short-term goal might be, “My goal is to lose 1 pound per week for the next 4 weeks.” A long-term goal might be “I will lose 20kg by ……” And then set out the steps on what you are supposed to do and do then it.

Review your goals each week to internalized them within yourself. If you experienced a setback or standstill with your goals, don’t panic and give up! Plod on! Soon you will be richly rewarded by owning an attractive and desirable body that others can only talk about!

And that’s it. Simple? Yes. But for it to work, your commitment is crucial. Gain back your confidence and self esteem now.



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We all want to become more confident and feel good about ourselves so we can live our very best life. Here are some ways to gain confidence and raise self-esteem:

1. Do something that requires a decision and a follow-through.

Have you been putting off writing that letter to aunt Martha? Is there a friend you’ve been meaning to call? Wash the car, tidy the garden or clean the house. You’ll gain confidence by setting goals (even small ones) and following through on them.

2. Enjoy something you do well.

Do you have any hobbies or sports that you enjoy playing? Some things like going swimming, painting or writing can hold your attention and get you into a state of ‘flow’. While you are in the flow you forget about everything else.

Afterwards, you’ll feel competent and capable. It’s a great way to boost your self-esteem. If you don’t have any particular hobbies or pastimes that you enjoy make an effort to try something you’ve always wanted to try.

Picture yourself doing it, and then give it a try! It doesn’t have to be something big – it can be as simple as joining a walking club.

You’ll find that you are more centered and happier if you do something that puts you in that flow at least once a week.

3. Shift the focus.

It’s been shown that low self-esteem develops hand-in-hand with individuals who put too much focus on themselves. You can gain confidence by doing something that focuses on someone else or even something else.

You’ll find that when you are in a situation where you are meeting new people, you immediately become less nervous when you focus on the person you are meeting.

At the end of the day, you’ve interacted with others and will notice that you feel much lighter.

4. Relax, already!

Learning to become more relaxed is a great life enhancer. People who are more relaxed have fewer problems with their memories and are more likely to take the bumps in the road of life in stride.

The practice of meditation has gained popularity for this reason. You might want to look into Tai Chi, which involves physical relaxation techniques.

Whatever method you decide on, take relaxation seriously. The benefits are just too great to ignore. If you’ve never considered relaxation important, think of it this way: if you can attend to something that results in feeling good, how can you not gain confidence in your personal abilities?

5. Make a list of everything you’ve ever accomplished.

Think small. An accomplishment is an accomplishment! Some things you could put on your list: passed my driver’s test and got my license, scored a goal when I played hockey, managed to save enough money to go on a trip and so on.

These are just a few ideas you can use to gain confidence and boost your self-esteem. Use these ideas as a base point and add these things permanently in your life.

Keep in mind, people are not born with good self-esteem, most of us have to work at it. It develops from your thinking and the things you do daily to make yourself feel good.



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f relationships and men chasing women go back to the Stone Age. When a caveman wanted his girl, he would usually clobber her over the head and drag her away. Since then, things have progressed a great deal. In the United States, as well as other countries, we are allowed to pick and chose who we would like to engage in intimate relationships with. Women have especially come a long way in this department. They no longer need to let a man court them. The tables have turned a little and they are able to chase after them without someone saying it’s wrong. I strongly feel that because of women’s strong roles in the dating field, men have become less confident, and therefore have problems approaching them. Women, especially sexy ones, can be very intimidating.

Here are some ways to be able to approach, flirt, and seduce a woman with confidence.

1. Take some deep breaths before you make your move.

2. As you approach her, let your smile beam through and remember that you are in control at this moment.

3. Do not feel nervous because although you may not see it, she is probably just as nervous seeing you approach her.

4. Think of what you are going to say before you make your move, so your words flow freely and you do not stumble.

5. And lastly, look her in the eye. DO NOT look down or away to make your approach seem distracted.

There are still many ways to gain confidence in attracting and seducing wome, of all kinds. However, these ways listed above may be a good start. Just remember that you are in control when you are approaching the woman. Your actions speak for themselves. Be confident in yourself and with all you can offer the woman of your dreams and the ‘dating game’ may be easier!



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Quite often, you will hear that having confidence with women is a key to attracting women. And this is definitely true. You have to be able to show that you are confident around a woman, if you really want to be seen as an alpha male. The thing of it is, you hardly ever hear about how to gain confidence with women.

Here are 3 killer tips to gain confidence with women:

1. Re-frame the situation in YOUR mind. A lot of men are guilty of putting too much pressure on themselves when it comes to dating and women. They try too hard to be the “perfect” guy or they see the situation as being too important. You don’t want to do this. You want to re-frame it as just being a chance to go out and have fun. This will take the pressure off and help your confidence with women.

2. Get used to being around women. For some men, it is not too often that they are around single women. If this is your situation, you may want to try just approaching women with the sole purpose to get a conversation going and to become comfortable around a woman. Not feeling like you have to get a phone number, a date, or sex will take the pressure off and allow you just to become comfortable around women.

3. Learn to control YOUR body language. Your body does most of the talking. Knowing how to use your body language the right way will make you come across as being more confident AND allow you to generate attraction with a woman right off the bat. This will ease the pressure as well and allow your confidence to rise.

Being able to show confidence around women is a key to attracting women. Yet, most men are unsure of HOW to gain confidence with women. These three killer tips will give you a good start.

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Copyright © 2009 Chris Tyler All Rights Reserved.



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